If you get both the swine flu and the bird flu, does it turn into “When pigs fly” influenza?

I know, you could even say, “When pigs flew (flu)” but it’s corny enough as it is, isn’t it?

Wow.  Talk about the wasted life.  25 years to design a card I would throw away because it doesn’t fit anywhere I could put it?

Love the pop up graphic, too.

A few months ago a service to send out emails to your “unsaved” friends in the case of “the rapture” made the news.

Last night, Law and Order (the original) featured a similar service as a main part of the plot.  Did you catch it?

Man, we look ridiculous to these people.

Sometimes thrill seekers get more than they bargained for, you know?

Several news agencies are reporting that a stock clerk in New Jersey lost his life as shoppers knocked him down and trampeled him to death today.  Apparently, few of the shoppers cared enough to even stop and observe the goings on.

It would appear that the only thing that got their attention was when store management shut the store down.

A pregnant lady was also knocked down and injured.  One source is reporting that the paramedics were overheard telling her that she lost the baby.

I’ve often espoused the opinion that the hassle isn’t worth the deals.  I am quite confident that the deals aren’t worth being a part of a mob that values those deals over life.

You can read about it from these services:

NY Daily News|Worker dies at Long Island Wal-Mart after being trampled in Black Friday stampede

Chicago Tribune|Wal-Mart worker dies in Black Friday stampede

Balitmore Sun|Wal-Mart worker in N.Y. dies after being trampled during Black Friday event

Fox 5 NY|Mall Worker Killed In Black Friday Trampling

KTAR.com|Wal-Mart worker dies after shoppers knock him down

Ok, so one of the blogs I read is from a Christian Radio Host, Brian Hanson, who comes up with some really “out there” websites from “Christian” folks.

Well, one website has a graphic depicting the potential Presidential election if the church were “raptured” this year:

However, if Jesus swings by and takes us out for a few years, the Electoral College is apt to look like this:

Thoughts?

HT:These People via Letters from Kamp Krusty.

…or… what not to do. We can all relate to the Oregon officials that thought they had a good idea that turned out to have unexpected consequences.

Oh, by the way, this is verified true by snopes.com.

And you can visit the longstanding, low-tech website: The Infamous Exploding Whale.

In this edition, a tool to keep your hands clean, a little girl’s power sander, 1950′s documentary of a dream trip to Disneyland (MUST WATCH), the most expensive bottled water (you thought gasoline was getting expensive…), writing 200,000 books ain’t that hard, ballroom dancing with dogs (not kidding), pachyderm painting, serious paintballers only, efficient freezer baggage, subdivision affordability with transportation factored in, table top biosphere, re-packaging your computer into a teddy bear, the new source of antibiotics: alligator blood (not kidding) and, finally, this week’s sign that the end is near: Mommy 2.0.

The Handler

This handy pocket tool/key chain keeps your hands off of filthy things, and has antibacterial coating as well. Germaphobes, this is for you!

The outrageous hello kitty Power sander

Well, it is what it says it is. A Hello Kitty power sander. Yikes.

Disneyland Dream

You’ve got to go watch this real live piece of Americana from the 1950′s. This Connecticut family documents the winning of a contest to go to the newly opened Disneyland in California. Fringe coats, different hats for the different areas of the park and a neighborhood tickertape parade to send them off in style.

Most Expensive Bottled Water

Need to drink water from a glacier? I hope you have some coin… Apparently this is all the rage among people with more money than sense.

LINK BY LINK; He Wrote 200,000 Books (but Computers Did Some of the Work)

Got writer’s block? Maybe you can borrow this guys computer program which will fill in the pieces for you after you give it the necessary information.

Dance, doggie, dance

No kidding, Youtube video of a dance with dogs as the partners. No kidding. Did I tell you I wasn’t kidding?

Elephant Painting

Youtube. Fascinating.

Paintball Turrett

Need to defend your fort? Watch your back while you snipe the enemy? You may be a little to serious about paintball, but this will help you do it. It is automatic.

Speed tip: Make individual portions in freezer bags

Freezer bag efficiency. This is actually a good idea.

How affordable is that subdivision?

Affordability Index

This set of links is to a story and tool, respectively, that will help you figure out what the real cost of a subdivision is when you factor in the cost of skyrocketing gasoline. If your city is like mine, the cheaper subdivisions are a long way away – and that means driving. How expensive is your home if you have to drive 25 miles to the office and then another 25 to get home?

Make your own Biosphere

For your desk as a conversation piece. Complete with shrimp and other fun, living things. Once you seal it, you never have to open it again.

Programmers, DIY Types Embrace Soft, Hackable Chumby

This computer is made to be taken apart and rehoused in whatever you want to put it in. Like a teddy bear.

Antibiotic Alligator: Promising proteins lurk in reptile blood

Thought that diseases were outsmarting our overuse of antibiotics? Apparently, there is a whole new reservoir of bacterial resistant proteins in the blood of alligators.

Mommy 2.0

This week’s sign that the end is near: A book that helps moms explain to kids why they are going to get plastic surgery.

This is different than the Link Load I offered you earlier in the week in that here, you get commentary on “news articles” and not just links to blog articles and interesting sites. Just so you know.

San Jose Mercury News – Sunnyvale homeowners told to cut redwoods that block solar panels

…or… Environmental Activism goes schizophrenic in California, are you surprised?

The Mercury News reports that active environmentalists are in a spat about which one is doing the best for the environment to the detriment of the other.

Make no mistake, there is something in it for everyone. The tree owners want their redwoods and their privacy, while the solar energy proponent wants the savings his arrays provide.

In case you’re wondering if it is worth it to click the article link, here is the silliest sentence in the article:

Kurt Newick, who sells solar systems for a San Jose company, says he loves trees as much as anyone, but he falls on the side of solar energy.

Couldn’t have anything to do with the fact that he makes a living off of solar energy, could it?

By the by… If the San Jose Mercury News wants you to input your info to see the article, try inputting this:

email: dont@bugme.com password: bugmenot1

You’re welcome.

Bug Foggers cause house explosion

Hey, you just can’t make that kind of thing up. It turns out that reading the label on the can would have pointed out that pilot lights would need to be out. That and not setting off SIX cans of the stuff simultaneously. Just how bad could the bugs have been? If they were that bad, wouldn’t you just be better off setting fire to the joint and then starting over? Hey…

Is Dobson’s political clout fading?

Time magazine asks the question as Focus on the Family gets close to endorsing a cadidate – once a necessity for a Republican in America. The article delves into the mix of Mormonism and Evangelicalism as Romney and Huckabee vie for evangelical favor.

Dobson seems to hold Romney out as a possibility and to hold off on Ordained Baptist Minister Mike Huckabee, who once would have been the “no brainer” candidate for Focus on the Family. The difficulty, it would appear, is that Dobson doesn’t want to back a loser:

Huckabee, Dobson cautioned after his Iowa victory, “may not become the Republican nominee.”

Well, Dr. D needs to figure out what Rush Limbaugh tauted years ago. It is not that he sways the masses, but speaks what is on the mind of the masses. If Dobson thinks he can endorse Mitt Romney and expect that Evangelicals in America will vote for him, he is in for the shock of his life. Instead, he will find himself drifting on a sinking dingy, looking back at the masses on the shoreline shaking their heads and wondering what happened to that guy of which they once thought so much.

Reminds me of the Southern Baptist Convention. But that’s a story 1 year, 2 years and 20 years old.

Kite to pull ship across Atlantic

This seems vaguely familiar. Didn’t we replace sailing ships with motorized ships for cargo use? Are we saying that might have been a mistake? :)

Not dead yet, Chilean man wakes up at his own wake

Is this good or bad? I might rather be in Heaven, if I were him. Nevertheless… I suppose this means they don’t embalm in Chile. Again, a positive if you are just cold and sleeping. And thirsty.